Congressional debate. What a trainwreck. But I’ve gotten ok
at it recently, so I guess I can attempt a basic outline of what I do.
Wednesday before the tournament—Legislation for debate drops
on tabroom.com. You get there as quickly as possible and scan the bills for
good topics, bad topics, and the number of schools, along with any familiar
names among the authors. You then must get on GroupMe, making sure to be the first
one to get all the Kentucky schools organized into a docket-making group—the
more assertive and connected you appear to the competition, the better. Docket
negotiations commence; don’t complain with what the more experienced debaters
decide to debate, just go with their flow and beat them wherever they put you.
Wednesday thru Saturday morning—Write all the speeches. ALL
OF THEM. And then take a nap Saturday morning from 1 to 4 to energize yourself
before you have to leave at 5:30 AM.
Saturday—Go into the tournament early to find small schools
and get their contact info, offering them information in exchange for votes
during procedural matters. Go into the chamber, smile at all the people you are
about to crush, and then do so with poise, aggressiveness, and intelligence.
Make yourself known to the big names and secure Presiding Officer positions to
maximize your chances of placing. Also, goof around with the host school’s property
during breaks—congress rooms often have pianos or fun chairs.
Saturday night—collapse on your bed and atrophy your brain
with YouTube.
That’s how I do Congress.
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